Thursday, March 12, 2015

Lessons Learned



I learned a plethora of invaluable information last week when so many in our household were sick.  Feel free to garner infinite wisdom from me:



  • When your uber masculine husband is sick, nothing does the trick quite like locking him in the bedroom and letting him watch chick-flicks all day long by himself.  His viewing choices?  The movie, Titanic, and soap operas.  I kid you not.  I thought this was really odd until I talked to his friend, also named Wes, who said he loved Titanic too.  Maybe it's a guy thing, maybe it's a Wes thing, maybe it's a sick day thing, maybe it's a sick-guy-named-Wes-thing.  The world may never know.  
  • I was sick one day and needed to throw up several times in the toilet.  One of those times, I apparently did not get the door clicked shut.  Kenyon opened the door and was able to observe.  This resulted in Kenyon standing in front of the toilet, closing his eyes, grunting/yelling and shaking his head back and forth violently.  As you can tell, I'm pretty attractive when I puke.  
  • I wish Kenyon would have put some of this useful puking knowledge to use when it was his turn to get sick.  It was his first time of actually puking and it scared him very badly.  During each episode I would hold him over the bathtub, the sink, the toilet - any large receptacle, and try to point his head downward.  It never failed; each and every time he got ready to puke, he would get scared, point his head towards me and start to say, "Mam---BLAH."  The end result?  We were both covered head to toe in regurgitated bologna, cottage cheese..... you get the drift.  It was not a pleasant evening at our house.  So, for all you mamas to be that think motherhood is glamorous and looks like this:  

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/
Think again.

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