Saturday, August 2, 2014

English, Just Not the Kind in Textbooks

We have a neighbor, John, who I would love to record and present to an ESL (English as a Second Language) class.  In a room of 100 ESL translators I bet less than two could understand his unique type of language.

"That's a heck of a crop of wool there."
Translation:
"Your kid has quite a bit of hair on his head."

"We got four blue dots before the orange ball had come up."
Translation:
"We had a little rain shower this morning right before dawn."

"Sounds like there's a rattler 'round here."
Translation:
"I think I have a flat tire.  I hear it hissing."


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Just like mama said... If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.