My Least Glamorous Post Ever

I want to preface this post by stating that I get immense satisfaction from weird 'adulting' tasks.  You know, handling shit on my own.  I don't always necissarily enjoy the process, but the end results can be so gratifying.  Case in point, finding health insurance each year for our family.  (I highly recommend looking into your area Farm Bureau health plans if you reside in Kansas.) This year, due to my diligence we should be able to save HUNDREDS each month in health insurance.  Hundreds of dollars, folks, not clam shells.  So exciting.  But I digress...

Finding hew health insurance is just one way that I am able to help my family succeed.  As an uber glamorous stay-at-home mom I am not always able to bring more money in for my family, but I can always find ways to save.  We have the cheapest cable tv package possible, we keep our heater on low in the winter (put on a damn sweater, people!), I make meals from scratch (yes, even when I'm tired and feeling lazy), and my personal favorite: I CLIP COUPONS.  

I've watched the extreme couponing shows and while that is aspirational, I cannot achieve that so I don't even try to purchase $600 worth of canned goods for $4. I would liken this to working out each day thinking I can someday look like a Victoria's Secret model.  These goals are not feasible for me so I try to set reasonable goals and hit them rather consistently.  Therefore, I try to run/walk several miles per week to keep myself healthy and I try to save as much as possible when couponing.  

The following is a rough outline of my couponing system.  On this particular excursion I managed to combine store coupons, Sunday paper coupons and sales in order to save $107 on a $300 shopping trip.  (Okay, technically it was $106.97 but this is my story and I'm rounding up the three cents.) 

I like to shop in the mornings as the stores are much less crowded.  It is worth it to me to get my behind out of bed and get going in order to miss the lunch crowd, the 'we're skipping naptime and that's why my kid is having a meltdown' crowd and all sorts of other various less desirable groups to shop with.  I find that shopping in the mornings usually leaves me surrounded by older men in overalls, and I'm perfectly at home in this environment.  

Shopping in the mornings means that I need to spend time planning my shopping trip sometime the day before.  It doesn't take me long; I just need 30 minutes to get prepared.  I'm not sure how else I can 'make' over $100 in 30 minutes for my family (despite what all those online businesses promise). 

Behold, my shopping list below which is really quite simple.  I list out everything I need.  The asterisk * next to items indicates that I have a coupon.  Two asterisks ** indicates two coupons for that item.  Also, I write a small description next to items that I have a coupon for.  This saves me soooooo much time in the store.  I don't have to search through all my coupons to find out if my cottage cheese needed to be 12 ounces, 20-30 ounces, buy two get one free, etc.  I simply write out briefly next to each item.  

• Soy sauce >55oz. *

(Purchase soy sauce, greater than 55 ounces, use a coupon.)

• Cheese, 24-32oz. **

(Purchase any cheese, 24-32 ounces, I have two coupons so purchase two packages of cheese.)

Also, you may notice that I have soy juice listed on my shopping list.  I do not, nor does anyone in my immediate family, drink this.  We love our dairy!  However, when my sweet little grandma asks me to purchase this I won't say no.  Whew.  Glad that's off my chest. 

After writing out my list I take a moment to sort through my coupons and order them.  I normally accumulate more than one coupon for the same item so I put all my salad coupons into one pile, all the cheese coupons in one pile, etc.  Then I can place them into my coupon divider quite easily.  The coupon divider is a small item that costs approximately $8 and allows me to sort coupons into categories.  One space for: refrigerated groceries, shelf stable groceries, toiletries, cleaning supplies, baby items, batteries, etc.  You can certainly arrange categories depending upon your personal needs.  

Also, turn your head sideways and view the coupons below.  I often have multiple coupons for the same product.  I place them in chronological order so the coupon expiring the soonest is on the top.  When pulling out coupons from my divider in the store this makes for one less hassle. 

Also of importance - COUPONS DON'T ALWAYS MAKE THINGS CHEAPER!  Behold below.  I really like to use Persil detergent (please consider this a plea to sponsor me, dear Persil executives).  I had a coupon for the Persil tabs.  After reviewing the unit price for each I noticed that the tabs were DOUBLE the price of the liquid detergent.  My $1 coupon was not enough to make up for the price difference.  (Also, I realize that the example below is for cereal.  It was the best picture example I could find on Google.)  

And there you have it folks, my couponing system in a nutshell.  I wasn't lying, this is likely one of my least glamorous posts ever, but perhaps one of the most important ones to my family.  If I can do this with three kiddos in tow I have faith that you can too.  I can't always bring in extra money, but I can always find ways to trim the fat and save for my family!  Now go forth and save!

Life Lately

I've not written in quite some time and the comments from friends and family (okay, like two of you) have been growing more concerned.  Thus, a blog full of life updates.  Of which we may have one or two....

 I just want to do a quick recap.  The picture below is what the children looked like last week, or so it seems.

And now I have these large creatures and I don't know what happened, much less WHEN this happened.

They are old enough now to drive themselves around, which is handy.  

Every Halloween we go to a friend's house where they have downhill power wheel races.  Best. Thing. Ever.  All of these power wheels are old and don't work.  The gears are stripped out of them so the only thing that powers them is gravity and a strong push from someone at the top of a steep hill that contains large rocks.  The kids don't run the full course, but participants roughly 10 years and over race down a hill more than 100 yards long and occasionally run into each other, do somersaults, run off course and into trees, etc.  My belly hurts terribly every year from laughing and this year was no exception.  It is good, clean fun.  No video games, no whining, no bitching and moaning.  Just some good smack talk and the occasional bruise or scrape.  It warms my heart.  (And if you happen to have any old power wheels that you would like to donate to the cause, let me know.  They typically don't last more than a season or two for obvious reasons.) 

Kenyon LOVES school, which came as quite the shock to me.  He has the most wonderful teacher ever, so I didn't anticipate a problem there, I just never imagined he would take this newfound job so seriously.  He enjoys the constant challenge that each day brings - like reading.  I cannot believe he can honest to goodness READ.  He is verrrrry serious when he gets off the bus each day and comes to my desk to lay out his paperwork.  He explains to me exactly what each worksheet entailed, some of the challenges and what was 'totally easy, Mom'.  I love that he loves to learn and hope it continues throughout his life.  My dad beat education into our heads.  'People can take most anything away from you, but they can never take away your education.'  Words to live by, folks. 

John is.... just John.  The kid cracks me up.  He has blossomed in his newfound role as 'top dog' now that Kenyon is gone all day to school.  He lives to make folks laugh and enjoys attending the school of hard knocks most every day with his dad.  

Kathryn is a pretty little girl, with her long, blonde flowing locks.  Her biggest downfall is that she has a fairly good idea that she's pretty.  I'm alright with this as long as she never plays the dumb, pretty girl card as she gets older.  I'll not stand for that.  She enjoys talking incessantly, wrestling with 'my boys', seeing 'my Justin' and being treated like a big boy.  While she does wear a pretty dress most Sundays to church, the rest of the time she's a filthy little animal that runs feral just like her brothers.

Wesley is doing well.  He works too many hours and has too many projects going all at the same time but he doesn't complain as he knew what he was getting into when he was born.  We both talk about how things are tough now but hopefully if we keep our heads down and keep working one day we can sit on the porch in rocking chairs and relax.  Then we laugh, heartily.  If we didn't enjoy it we wouldn't do it, right? 

And then there's me.  Pregnant, again.  But if we didn't enjoy kids we wouldn't keep having them, right?  I'm due in the spring, which is perfect as that's typically one of our slowest times of the year.  *Insert eye roll here*  I've never had babies born this far apart, so I'm at a bit of a loss on what to do when you only have one in diapers.  Sometimes I kid myself into thinking I'll have all sorts of free time on my hands, and then I remember that the oldest are now able to be enrolled in t-ball, swimming lessons, school activities and all the other fun things and then I realize we'll be just as busy as ever while toting this little one around.  

It is always an adventure around here, that's for sure. 

A Royally Unique Experience

My husband and I don't get away often.  Lack of time, lack of funds, lack of babysitters and too many responsibilities at home usually get in the way.  Adulting is tough, am I right?  

But last week one afternoon the stars aligned and we were able to drive to Kansas City for an afternoon of meetings and then attend a Kansas City Royals baseball game.  The company that hosted us rented out one of the two 'dugout suites' for the evening so we were fortunate to watch the game from a rather unique perspective.  

It almost made me wish I were a professional baseball fan.  Almost.... I'm sorry, I realize I may be in the minority, but I find it difficult to spend time, energy or money supporting a recreational industry where some of the participants are paid millions.  It's just not my jam.  (But if a drug company invites us and also provides free food and drinks I'm totally fine with being a fair weather fan.)

I was blown away by the enormity of the property.  There were so many extra amenities I did not expect, like the mini golf, carousel, restaurant after restaurant, fountains, statues... the list goes on and on.  You are most definitely provided with opportunities to have an 'experience' versus just a ball game, and that surprised both of us.  

My one regret is not asking the Fox Sports sidelines analyst if I could hold his microphone once he finished his broadcast.  After all, we did get to set right next to his filming area.  If we ever get the chance to do something like this again you can count on a photo of me holding his mic and  'broadcasting'.  That's right, folks.  These are some of my bucket list items.  I keep my list short and expectations low to ward off inevitable disappointment! 

The man in the center is apparently a badass according to a friend I was sitting with.

Good job, Mr. Badass.  Go get 'em. 

One Thing

Do you ever have a day where you'd like to accomplish ONE TASK from start to finish within a reasonable time frame?  This is becoming one of my loftier goals in life these days it seems.

Yesterday morning I had the kids loaded up in the car and driving to town 30 miles away at a fairly early hour.  We drove 10 miles down the road before John decided to throw up all over himself and the car seat.  This caused us to turn around and drive back home.  I called into the meeting on my phone, turned on the speakerphone (and most importantly the MUTE button) and proceeded to shower my child and tear his car seat apart all while listening to great ideas from the group during their meeting.

Later that morning I walked outside to check on my other kids to realize I had a pile of puke-covered clothes lying in the driveway that I hadn't touched yet. Anther chore to get to.  While trying to carry those into the house very gingerly my phone rang... a neighbor needed me to run BVD snap tests on some new cattle he just got in.  No problem, we'll add that to the list.  I went into my super-duper fancy lab (aka utility room) to set up my supplies but remembered that I can't run snap tests until I switch around loads of laundry.  You see, the top of my washing machine also doubles as my lab workspace.  Not a problem.  I set down the puke covered clothes in a pile on the floor while the first load of laundry finished and moved onto another task.

I moved into my office area and started calling businesses and ordering supplies.  I called the vet supply man and ordered things I needed for next week.  Called the vet clinic and asked for health papers to be written so the men could ship cattle first thing the next morning.  Sent off all needed info to the clinic and waited.  While the fax machine was ringing and the health papers were being sent through I heard a knock on the door... the neighbor with the snap tests.  I bounded through the house, answered the door and spoke with the neighbor for a whopping 30 seconds while he laughed at the hot mess he had encountered.  Boys wrestling (how do they have energy after being sick?!), my daughter riding her trike right through the middle of them, and everyone yelling at the top of their lungs.

I took the snap tests inside to run.... only to be hit with an awful stench of puke covered clothes that needed to be washed.  I had to switch around laundry before I could do anything else.  Added the clean clothes to a mountain that was already on my bed.  I like to put my laundry there as it FORCES me to actually fold it and not just let it lie on the couch for 1-3 business days.  So I got the laundry switched around and just started to lay out supplies for the snap tests.  A child came into the house to complain about being hungry.  I looked down at my watch and, sure enough, time for lunch.... or 30 minutes past the normal time.  Whoops!  I made lunch for them and an extra bologna sandwich for myself.  While they ate at the kitchen table I ran snap tests at my washing machine and occasionally leaned over to grab a bite of sandwich off the plate sitting on the dryer.

My husband walked in the house and needed a ride out to the field to get a baler and tractor.  No problem.  I got the kids loaded up, grabbed the last of my tests that needed to finish 'cooking', and proceeded to drive everyone to the field.  I looked down at the console of my vehicle to check the tests and, sure enough, one was positive.  While my husband and one kid loaded up in the tractor I stayed behind in the field momentarily to text two neighbors about the sick calf I had just discovered through the test.

We got home in time to strip everyone down to their underwear - my daughter so she could take her afternoon nap and the boys so they could play with waterguns outside.  I spent the next nearly two hours trying to play catchup.  Cleaning up after lunch, folding laundry, paying a bill or two, scrubbing the curdled milk mess off the straps of the carseat, etc.  My husband walked in the house when there was still 30 precious minutes of naptime to be had.

"Let's go haul hay before it starts to rain."

Yes, let's.  That sounds like fun.  I had a list of sarcastic comments running through my head but kept my mouth shut. I filled a water bottle, grabbed a bag of animal crackers and threw clothes on all three kids in a hurry.

For the next nearly 2 hours I drove a pickup and hay trailer around, chasing my husband on the tractor who kept giving me bales.  The boys and I would drop them off at the hay yard and drive back to Wesley and Kathryn who would then load us up again.  John was tired as he was the kid who had been sick that morning.  Bouncing around in the field got the best of him and he proceeded to fall asleep with his head on my lap.  His drool was warm and uncomfortable on my leg but I could tell his little body appreciated the respite.

We arrived back home a bit after our normal supper time.  I quickly heated up some chicken nuggets, threw some fruits and veggies on the plate and called it a sufficient meal.  Then jammies, prayers and off to sleep.

*****

A few weeks ago I complained to my husband that I felt like I had cinder blocks on my feet.  By the end of the day I physically was unable to move any more and I had diagnosed myself (courtesy of WebMD) as having low thyroid levels.

I called the doctor's office and spoke with the nurse who agreed perhaps we should test my blood levels and 'oh by the way did you know you haven't been to the doctor since you had your last baby over two years ago'.  Whoops, my bad.

As I sat on the edge of the exam table in my little dressing gown the next week I explained to the doc that day how I was so tired these days and what was wrong with my body?  She knows our family pretty well at this point, and she giggled.  "That's life with three kids that are always with you and a husband and a farm.  I'm guessing your thyroid is fine."  Touché.

Not all days are quite so hectic, but days like that certainly make me thankful for mornings like this one where I can listen to a thunderstorm outside while sipping my coffee and letting the kids sleep in an extra ten minutes.  Today, my goals are simple.  Today, I would like to accomplish just one thing from start to finish in a reasonable amount of time.  Wish me luck.

These are a Few of My Favorite Things (Summer Edition)

Now that we all have an image of Julie Andrews prancing around in a field stuck in our heads, let's proceed, shall we? 

I enjoy my morning run by the corn field.  It has finally grown tall enough that the blazing sun doesn't scorch me until it has risen fairly high in the sky, by which time I am certainly done running. 

This is quite possibly one of my favorite pictures ever.  We went as a family one evening to move hay bales off the field.  I let the kids out during one load to 'blow some stink off' and they played tag and ran to their hearts' content. 

Question: What is better than an impromptu party with your cousins?

Answer: Not a dang thing.

Also quickly becoming another favorite of mine: the dreaded cousin hangover.  When you play so long and so hard that your earthy existence hangs in the balance for the following 24 hours at a minimum.  Symptoms include: falling asleep at the supper table, crying for no apparent reason, scowling at the general public, and drifting off into daydreams of the fun times had while clutching your princess heart shaped mirror. 

Fishing as a family with our dogs.  They are so awesome.  

Does he have a future as a racecar driver?  His mother says NO. 

I love that child #2 has taught child #3 to slant at an unnatural angle and ruin any attempt to take a decent picture of them while clean and dressed in church clothes. 

She enjoys 'writing' letters to people and reads the letters aloud to me as she scribbles away. 

MOST of the time, he's the world's most helpful big brother.  He doesn't take that responsibility lightly. 

These kids have been feather-finding, egg-finding, nature-finding fools that summer.  It seems like I constantly have an egg, lizard, feather, toad or bug shoved in my face to admire. 

If I take a morning run in one direction, I see nothing but corn.  If I run the other direction, this is my view.  On mornings when I know it will be a magnificent sunrise I usually opt to run this direction.  I've yet to be disappointed. 

Her little smirk makes it difficult to parent in a stern manner sometimes.  

Our kids fell in love with snapping beans with their grandad.  Kenyon snapped for two hours solid and never wanted to leave and play with his siblings. 

The world's very best goodnight hug. 

Very similar to a cousin hangover, a grandparent hangover can also be quite lethal.  Beware. 

These are a few of my favorite things.  (Sorry, I couldn't leave you without that little earworm.  I hope it gets stuck in your head the rest of the day.) 

Get Ready

Last night while sitting at the supper table I heard that oft heard, oft dreaded phrase once again uttered.

"Well, get ready" he said.  "It's fixin' to get busy around here for the next six weeks."

Really?  Like the last six weeks haven't been busy?  Or the six before that?!

I rolled my eyes when I heard this.  It's one of my least attractive qualities and one of the reasons I wear sunglasses so often.  As my eyes turned towards the heavens; however, my gaze landed upon a book that has been sitting on my bookshelf for years:

This one - she gets me.  We're kindred spirits born 125ish years apart.  We've both had to bust our tails on the same soil.  Both probably rocked babies and wondered where in the world our husband was at and when he was coming home.  I saw the pooch in her belly and wondered if she was 4 months pregnant or just had acquired a permanent 'shelf' like mine after having 3 kids in 3.75 years.  It's not lost on me the countless ways my life is filled with more creature comforts than hers, but I appreciate the biggest commonality we share - we're both just trying to raise good kids and eek out a living.

I wondered if she breathed a huge sigh of relief when someone else offered to take her kids to the nursery during church so she could have 30 minutes a week without being in charge of someone else (but let's be honest, she probably didn't) and then I wondered what she would have done for self care, a phrase that's become so over-used and abused that I've come to despise.  Truth be told, we're probably looking at it in this photo.  She got 30 minutes to herself and decided to pick up cow chips for firewood and she was relishing in the quiet until someone interrupted her solitude and asked to take a photo.  I feel you, girl.

"Are you listening?  Hellllooooo?" my husband asked as I snapped back to reality.  I didn't realize how many moments I'd been lost in my thoughts with this prairie woman.

"We've got it.  We're ready.  Bring on the next six weeks of haying and shipping and fair and life."

Now that I've 're-found' this book on my shelf I imagine that I'll be glancing upward at her quite often for a little inspiration.

The Long Game

It's that time of year again; the time when our alarm goes off at 5:30 each morning and our heads hit the pillow absolutely exhausted at 10 each night.

It's the time of year when I cook as much as possible on the grill so I don't have to turn on the oven and heat up the house because we refuse to turn on the air conditioner just yet.

It's the time of year when the boys wake up at 5:45 and barrel down the stairs for the day.  They see the sun shining through their window and know that they need to get in gear.

It's the time of year to pick cherries and then enjoy the fruits of your labor.  Literally.  (One of the few times literally has actually been used correctly.)

It's the time of year that we don't see much of my husband and I'm a single parent 90% of the time.  This is getting better as the kids get older but it's still me the majority of the time.

It's the time of year when we do get an occasional evening to see Wesley and spend some time as a family fishing together.

It's the time of year when we spend lots of time in the garden and flower beds and I try to incorporate science and life lessons in here and there.

It's a very fulfilling life, a very tough life and hopefully one day a very rewarding life.  When things get too hard sometimes Wesley and I will sit at the supper table long after the dishes have been put away and make sure we are still on the same page with our goals.  We make sure that 'not raising little assholes' is at the top of our list, followed by a bevy of other things.  We try to find the balance between providing a nice life for the kiddos and creating little monsters that don't understand what work is.  We want them to realize food doesn't just come from a grocery store, money doesn't grow on trees and hard work is worth it.  I don't know that we always get that balance correct, but I hope the majority of the time this is the case.

I appreciate so many things about these kiddos.

I love that they enjoy simple things in life.  We went on vacation and the thing they enjoyed the most was paddle boating as a family on the lake each morning, not the flashing lights and hoopla found everywhere else.

I love that they enjoy hard work.  They LIVE to work calves and help me in the wood shop.  Kenyon jumped in the alleyway to push baby calves one day, got kicked several times and was so proud to show me the bruises from his hard work.

I love that they are content to play for hours outside.  They can make their own entertainment without screen time.

I love that they enjoy grocery shopping with me and are starting to understand coupons and sales, or at least understand that they are of major importance to our family.  This has lead to several conversations about price as well as value.

I love the big picture, hard questions that Kenyon is starting to ask.... most of the time.  Sometimes I find myself tiptoeing as delicately as possible.  Still answering the question but in a roundabout way.  Not much gets by him and therefore he's got THOUSANDS of questions that need answered.  Every. Single. Day.

I read a quote once that really stuck with me.  If you raise your kids then one day you'll be able to enjoy and spoil your grandkids.  If you spoil your children you'll end up raising your grandkids.  This part of our lives is absolutely exhausting, but we keep this quote in the forefront of our minds and tell ourselves that someday it will all be worth it.  Not saying it's a guarantee, but at least we're trying to build a strong foundation for the long haul.