Things to never say to your pregnant wife:
-How do you keep your belly from burning on the stove?
-You look like the blower on a silage cutter the way you shovel chips into your mouth.
-Definitely not gaunt. Definitely.
-So, what did you eat for dinner today? (Waits for my answer.) Was that morning dinner, dinner dinner, or mid-afternoon dinner?
**I must put this disclaimer in. Wesley says a million nice things to me every day. These are just the funny ones that I can actually remember for short periods of time. He is NOT a mean person, just hilarious! (And yes, I laugh at this stuff too.)
I had a friend who once burnt her pregnant belly quite badly by tipping a stock pot full of boiling water and potatoes toward her instead of away when trying to pour it all into a colander. The boiling water poured all over her belly. She showed me the burns. I still have nightmares.
ReplyDeleteThe moral of this story? I don't know. Always tip the stock pot away from your pregnant belly, I guess.
At least he hasn't offered to call the vet out and run u through the shoot for your check up.
ReplyDeleteKristy - EEEEEK! Please feel free not to share any more horror stories with me. Although I do appreciate the moral of the story.
ReplyDeleteBJ - Those jokes have happened since day one. I'm getting really good with my selective hearing skills.